© Marta Musa Artist 2010 - 2020

 

 

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That Time the Dog was Smarter than Me

October 3, 2019

 

 

See all these pictures of Carmela…she has been wearing one version or another of these judgmental doubtful expressions all morning. Why you ask? Well…because this morning she run down stairs like a dog on a mission and spent 5 minutes barking at the front door….I in turn yelled at her to stop yelling at whatever was at the door (which I wrongly assumed was just a figment of her reactive imagination…more on that later). She barked…I yelled…she sent her brother up to the room I was in to get me. Fred stared at me woefully as if to say “Maahhmm…I phink dhere is someone at dah door…Carmela won’t stop barking”….tired and irritated I told him to quit feeding his sister’s crazy and go lie in his bed…and obedient child that he is, he cooperatively shrugged his shoulder and went to lie down on the bed. Carmela continued to yell at the front door…determined not to get caught up in her “Drama” I immaturely yelled down “ I can’t hear you!” and pretended nothing was happening.
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Two hours later Gordon comes home and says to me “Dude…there is a notice out here from Fed-ex…why didn’t you open the door to get your drug delivery when Fed ex came this morning?”
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In my defence, I now realize Bertha is very much at the wheel today. I had the drug delivery scheduled in my calendar and had even reviewed that it was happening last night. However, in all fairness, after the week I have had it is unrealistic of me to expect that I am not going to have some hiccups. You see, on Tuesday I had a day from the very devil. I went in to have a long awaited Tympanoplasty surgical repair under general anaesthetic…and instead had to accommodate the medical team’s last-minute safety decision to do it under sedation with local anaesthetic (don’t ask…long story...lots of tears). Suffice it to say, Bertha (my brain injury) and I did not have the coping skills to be awake and aware for 75 minutes while someone drilled and sawed away in our ear canal…yup…it sounds as loud and scary as you would imagine. She and I held hands, rocked back and forth, tried not to hyperventilate while continuously tearing up through the procedure.
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I share this to give the reader some perspective on how tolls paid on one day by an individual with a brain injury…how those tolls can exact a significant cost over the days/weeks/months to come.
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And that is how it came to be that I almost set breakfast on fire, I have spent an unnecessary amount of time blankly staring at my phone because I can’t recognize the app I am looking for, I have used the calculator app to try and make phone calls (personal favorite of Bertha’s this one), decided the cast iron pan needed to be scrubbed out with soap (go ahead shake your head)….and how it is I came to have indulged in the episode of immaturity this morning, and proven to the world that Carmela has more sense than I do. Y’all need to send some thoughts and prayers that I make it through the next few weeks.

 

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